squeetus

Shannon answers your probing inquiries* *probe not included

Here are a few questions I keep getting via email/comments/in person. If you have others, ask away in the comments and I'll answer as many as I can next post.

"When will Forest Born paperback come out?"

As usual for me, US paperback will come out 2 years after the hardcover release, so fall 2011. forest born is in paperback already in the UK/Australia.

"Will there ever be an Alison Jay painting on a Forest Born hardcover? I want a matching set!"

I have many hopes that one day there will be, but if it happens, it will be a special gift edition, a limited time sort of thing, and not this year at the very least. I hope, but I'm not holding my breath.

"Will you be making any appearances in my state anytime soon?"

No. For the time being, all my appearances will be confined to the couch and/or bed. Preferably while reclining on my left side and eating a medium rare steak. The only possible appearance I might be making would be August 21 at Writing for Charity. Otherwise, I doubt I'll be traveling for the next couple of years.

"When are you due?"

Mid-October, but I'm sure we'll welcome the little hell raisers before then. 

"What was your 'super secret project' - your pregnancy or Midnight in Austenland?"

Neither! Sorry, I still haven't been able to reveal that. I try not to talk about it anymore because I know that must be annoying and I really don't know at this point when (if ever!) I can reveal. Which is hard because it's something I've spent hundreds of hours on over the past year and has been a fascinating journey for me. I'm eager to share! Just as soon as my lawyers and the government of Lichtenstein give me leave. (Just kidding about the lawyers. But not Lichtenstein.) (Okay, just kidding about Lichtenstein too. Really it's Mali.)

"What are you going to name your baby girls?"

No clue.

"Will there be a fifth book of Bayern?"

I'll never say never again when it comes to Bayern, but I am not currently writing one.

"What are you currently writing?"

Midnight in Austenland. Ooh, the title alone gives me a thrill! Can't wait to share! Sometimes Daisy Danger Brown, though the latter won't be finished and published for years, I'd guess. It's definitely gotten the shaft this year. Sorry, Daisy.

Address any other non-burning questions in the comments. Burning questions should go to your doctor. (I stole that from Libba Bray.)

Rapunzel: no cape, no tights

This made my day! Fabulous librarian and graphic novel guru Robin Brenner made a Rapunzel outfit and sported it recently at ALA. (Which reminds me...I will be doing a costume contest around Halloween. Dressing up as characters from any of my books gains you entry. Send photos.) This outfit is what we called Rapunzel's superhero outfit from calamity jack. I love it.

In rapunzel's revenge, Rapunzel wears pretty ridiculous clothing for the first half of the story. Then Jack buys her some new garb. In the script when she first puts it on, we described it to Nate Hale (illustrator) as the moment Superman emerges from the phone booth. It's her kicking-butt clothing, the clothes that express the kind of girl she's become. Jack buys them for her, showing how well he knows her, and how highly he thinks of her awesomeness. This is a lad who is not intimidated by a powerful girl. You gotta love Jack. (He was pretty easy to write. I happen to be married to a man who is the least sexist person I've ever known. Can you imagine I'd marry him otherwise? How lucky his three daughters are/will be to have a dad like him!)

In calamity jack, Rapunzel goes to the big city and tries to fit in with how she thinks Jack wants her to be. She spends the first half in a cumbersome (though lovely) Victorian dress. At one point she goes out to buy Jack a piece of clothing (I won't spoil it if you haven't read it yet). It is the one thing in all the world he would want and best expresses who he is. While she is out, we decided she would shed her constricting garb and buy herself a new, updated superhero outfit, one that combined elements from the previous but with a slick, urban style. This is Rapunzel Kicking Butt in the Big City. Nate grew up in a theater family and has a wonderful sense of costumes. He did lots of research and sketches until he found just the right look for her. I LOVE the jacket. She's so awesome in these clothes.

Nate really is incredible. I could pour over calamity jack for hours, examining all the little details he includes. Genius. He created a live, bustling, turn-of-the-century, steampunk/fairy tale city and perfectly expressed a hundred different characters. Pure genius.

How to be a writer's friend (or spouse)

Dean now has in his hot little hands (i.e. ipad) the latest draft of Midnight in Austenland. This will be his first reading of the book. Dean and I have been married for 10 years, friends/dating for 11 years before that. There's been lots of time for me to, oh-so-gently, train him in the art of reading my stuff. Make no mistake--it is an art, and it requires training. I know some writers who expect their spouses to just know how to respond. They don't! They're clueless! Call the Spouse Whisperer and train them before someone gets bit. You as the writer must communicate to your friend/spouse what you're expecting, what kind of things you want to hear, when you expect a response. And acknowledge that you're asking a favor, not granting a privilege.

Friends of writers, here are my tips for you on how to respond to a loved one's story.

1. Read it right away. A manuscript sitting untouched on your side table for a month tells your loved one you don't care. If you can't read it right away, communicate that. Let her know when you'll be able to start and when you expect to finish. (The Husband made this grave error too often early on and his reading privileges were revoked for a few years.)

2. Being observed by the writer while reading can be an uncomfortable experience. Still, if it's a novel, you can expect the writer to check in with you occasionally. "So, have you started? What do you think so far?" ALWAYS say something positive. Save any critical feedback for later, after you've read it all and sorted your thoughts. Otherwise, it'll seem you're just so anxious to point out faults you can't wait. This is not only discouraging to the writer, but unhelpful.

3. After you've finished, sit down with your loved one and immediately and profusely PRAISE THE STORY. I know you want to get to what needs to change, but if you can't see something worthwhile in it, the writer won't be as responsive to the feedback. Hearing what worked is as important to the writer as what didn't. Be specific, and sincere, in your praise. Think of ten separate things you liked and thought worked well.

Good examples:

"The opening was gripping."

"I was really interested in Character X."

"All the dialog between X and Y was so realistic."

"This is, without a doubt, the most amazing book I've read since The Goose Girl, or really anything by Shannon Hale, because she's such a genius. And so are you."

Bad examples:

"I really liked it, except for the middle part and the ending." Never qualify your praise!

"It wasn't very hard to read." Lame.

"You're pretty good at punctuation." Double lame. A writer doesn't care about punctuation proficiency at this point. A writer wants to grip you with the story and and characters!

"You're even better than that hack Shannon Hale." (unless it's true...)

4. After specifically and sincerely praising at least ten things, offer some constructive feedback. Limit yourself to THREE things. Three specific things. Try to be as clear and concise as possible. No need to hammer it in. If you are not a professional editor, it's best not to take the Voice of Authority here. Offer the suggestions in terms of what questions and confusions you had as a reader.

Good examples:

"I didn't understand why X had to steal the magic dagger when she already had the magic sword."

"I loved Y! I wouldn't mind seeing more of him, especially in the second half."

"X seemed to lie a lot, and that made me suspicious of her and made it hard for me to like her."

"The part where they all turned into goatlings was confusing to me. I kept expecting them to get milked, because of the whole cheese theme, but when they didn't I realized I must have missed something."

Bad examples:

"It didn't make sense. You should redo it all."

"This part was really boring. Cut all of it."

Notice the good examples employ the word "I." You're couching all your feedback in terms of how it affect YOU, not trying to make huge blanket statements about the book's universal crappiness.

5. Now some of you will question the THREE THINGS rule. I think it's a very good one, but can be broken if the writer desires it. Dean and I are way past this rule at this point. But unless you've earned an all-access pass to criticism, don't offer any more information or feedback unless asked (pressed!) to do so. She might not be able to absorb any more than those three things, and the more "feedback" you offer, the more criticism she'll hear. Unrequested advice will always sound like criticism.

Remember, you not only want to be helpful to the writer but preserve your relationship. Spouses may find themselves couch-sleeping after being TOO helpful with the feedback. Let workshop companions and editors be the bad guy. You're the loved one. You should be very cautious, my friend. Writers are sensitive little creatures, full of yearning and hope and (at the moment) pasta and bean salad.

So, honey, I gave you that manuscript on Thursday. And it's Saturday. So...how's it going?

A book for every kid

Many of you may have participated in our Writing for Charity event the past couple of years and know how awesome it is. This year it's even bigger and better! We'll have a morning workshop and an evening entertainment-filled event. Go to either one or both. I've been doctor-warned not to plan on anything from this time forward, so I can't say whether or not I'll be there. I'd love to if I can! But plenty of other amazing authors will attend. I don't have the author list yet, but if they live in Utah, they'll probably be there. Here's the details, taken from Kristyn Crow's website.

Readers and Writers….SAVE THE DATE!

August 21, 2010
The Waterford School
1700 East 9550 South
Sandy, UT 84093

The Children’s Literature Association of Utah (CLAU)

and

The ROCK CANYON CHILDRENS AUTHORS AND ILLUSTRATORS of UTAH PRESENT:

A BOOK FOR EVERY CHILD

CHARITY EVENT

Help us put books in the hands of underprivileged kids in Utah!

DAYTIME WRITING WORKSHOP: (Pre-register by August 15 $60/Walk-in $70)
Love writing? Spend a fabulous day with award-winning Utah authors! Get hands-on writing advice and move your manuscript closer to publication! Author panel, critiques, and book signings. Lunch provided.
(For adults and children 12 and older.)

EVENING EXTRAVAGANZA: (Pre-register by Aug. 15- $10/Walk-in $15, Family price $25) Book-Lover but not a writer? Or, just looking for a fabulous night out? Come to an evening extravaganza with entertainment by singer Nancy Hanson, The Divine Comedy troupe, a celebrity author panel, and a raffle with prizes that will astound you! (Adults and children over 12.)

COMBINED PACKAGE:($65 Pre-registration by August 15 price)
Love BOTH reading and writing? Attend the workshop , followed by the evening event! Have an experience you won’t forget, and all in the name of literacy! Remember, your purchase benefits Utah kids!

ALL PROCEEDS GO TOWARD PUTTING BOOKS IN THE HANDS OF UNDERPRIVILEGED UTAH KIDS.

TO REGISTER visit: www.writingforcharity.com.

Or mail a check to:

CLAU - Writing for Charity [Make checks out to CLAU]
P.O. Box 614
Layton, Utah 84041

Please include the following information: Names of all participants and whether they will attend the workshop or evening event, or both, and contact information including your address and a telephone number.

Preparing for Zombie Mode

I met someone the other day who thought I looked familiar, so we tried to figure out where he might know me. In the end, he knew my parents. I was telling my mom about it and she said, "Didn't it occur to you that he might know you from your books?" And you know, it never for a moment crossed my mind.

I do get recognized from time to time--usually when I give my name for something (awkward when it's a new nurse at your gyno appointment and you're in nothing but a hospital gown). I'm always amazed when I'm in a random location, like another state or the airport or on the street, and people recognize my face. How do they know? Just from the author photo on the book jacket? Weird! It happens very rarely, but it does happen, so you'd think that would have occurred to me.

The incident made me realize how removed I feel from my Author persona lately. I told my mom, "I've been distanced from the book world for so long I don't even feel like a writer anymore." Then I was like, lady, what in the heck are you talking about? forest born came out less than a year ago, calamity jack in January, actor and the housewife in paperback last month, you toured in February and April, and you're knee deep in revisions for midnight in austenland. Where exactly is this separation?

I don't know. I don't know why I feel this way and have for months. Let's see, months...what's been going on the last few months? Of course. I'm in Full Gestation Mode. I am nothing but an incubator. My entire existence is my growing belly and all the mysterious, fluidy things going on inside. And my brain is prepping me for the upcoming day when I enter Full Mothering Mode, become a Prize Dairy Cow 24/7 and think no thoughts but "Babies. Eat. Sleep. Babies." And when I stumble into the grocery store seeking binkies and wipes and high calorie treats, if I'm recognized at all, it'll be by other mothers who will think, "That strange woman must have twins."

How my ipod makes me a safe driver

I like hearing about everyone's grammatical pet peeves. Apostrophe misuse is a major one, though I admit it doesn't annoy me so much as entertain me. There's a business called Snyder's Brothers Meats. I like thinking about this Snyder character, who has nothing to do with the meat business, but he must be some heck of a guy that his brothers love him so much they named their business after him. Those brothers of Snyder, so diligent in their meat shop, so mindful of their vegetarian brother.

I was interested in Lia's comment about "I feel badly." I took a linguistics course in college and LOVED it so much. For hopeful writers, I highly recommend taking a basic grammar course or more in college. It's important to know the rules before you decide which rules to break. Besides, the history of language is fascinating. I would love to go back and major in Linguistics. And History. And other stuff. In that course I learned the difference between a prescriptivist and descriptivist. Basically the former believes in adhering to all the rules of grammar to the letter (noting that they do change over time), and the latter believes in a language's need to change and adapt in order to communicate. I was raised by a prescriptivist, which is great training, but I side with the descriptivists. I believe language is about communication, and "Who am I speaking to" is easier to understand and say than "To whom am I speaking" because "who" is more important than "to" in that sentence. So for me, adios old fashioned rule that says never end a sentence in a preposition. Unless it's superlative, as in "Where is it at?" The at is unnecessary, though quite full of character. That's why, for me, "I feel badly" is grotesque. Whether or not it's in keeping with rules, it doesn't communicate properly. It's confusing. It's an anomaly. I don't likes it, I don't. But if I ask you how you are and you say "Good" I will only be pleased.

Of course grammar issues are a kind of fun kerfuffle to debate, whereas texting while driving is LIVE THREATENING. Just say no to distracted driving! ...and I begin to contemplate how focused I'll be driving my car with two babies and two kids hollering at me and demanding sippy cups and entertainment. My plan? Good music. It's amazing how well a good song on a good system can drown out background noise.

Three pet peeves to cheer up your Wednesday

"I feel badly." That's shocking! Do you have leprosy? Some kind of neural dysfunction? Linguists, please correct me if I'm wrong, but "I feel badly" is commenting on one's ability to feel, not state of emotion. We don't say I feel sadly or I feel happily. If you want to say how you're feeling, the state of your emotions, an adjective, not adverb, is correct. I heard Donald Trump correct someone on TV the other day with this very phrase. I used to think it was a weird regional phenomenon, but if the Donald has been taken in, it's clearly a widespread plague. And it's got to stop!

Recently we were driving on a highway going 55 MPH. Dean was driving. I look over and see the man racing alongside us, texting as he went. I counted how long he was looking down: 1...2...3...4...5... He looked up to see that yes, he was still more or less in his lane and still going 55, so down he looked again, 1...2...3...4...5... My math isn't great, but I think at that speed we were going 400 ft in 5 seconds. Who in their right mind is comfortable driving 400 ft without looking? I glared at him till he noticed me. I hope he understood: Hey, Jackwad! I've got kids in this car! You are being reckless and stupid and putting my kids' lives at stake! He did look properly chagrined and put down his phone. We caught up with him again a mile or so later. Back at it again. This arrogance gets me riled up. Really? What you're doing is SOOO important you're willing to risk your life and others'? You're probably checking email and reading a news blip about celebrity divorces. Jackwad.

Since H1N1 outbreak, so many public places have installed sanitizer dispensers. This is great! Until I go to use it, discover that the sanitizer is out, so now my hands are not only still dirty, but I've infected them with all the bacteria and viruses left behind by other sanitizer seekers. Ugh.

A little snark, properly directed, can change the world. Snark away, my friends.

They loved science in the eighties

And I'm calling it for Je Reve! Congrats, Je Reve, you will be rewarded richly in the life hereafter for so brilliantly completing the quiz. You got all but one right. #1, science is involved, but it's not Weird Science. Here are the answers:

1. She's Blinded Me with Science, Thomas Dolby

2. One Night in Bangkok, Murray Head (Chess soundtrack)

3. Honeycomb, Jimmie Rogers

4. Loves Me like a Rock, Paul Simon

5. Low, T-Pain

6. Grandma's Feather Bed, John Denver

7. Hey Baby, No Doubt

8. Bette Davis Eyes, Kim Carnes

9. Don't Leave Nobody but the Baby, Emmylou Harris (Oh Brother Where Art Thou)

10. Never Loved a Man, the Queen of Soul (aka Aretha Franklin

I was surprised more people don't know Honeycomb. That's a great old song. And I thought Bette Davis Eyes would be easy so I only gave a short clue. Paul Simon's album Negotiations and Love Songs is one of my top ten albums of all time. It's true. I crush on Paul Simon. And Aretha Franklin has been one of my nearest and dearest musical companions for 25 years. If any of you gave me a quiz of contemporary music I would FAIL big time. I'm kind of a fogie. In the eighties I mostly listened to classic rock. I had to catch up.

So I'm as large now at 22 weeks pregnant as I was at 36 weeks with one baby. People tell me I "carry it well" so you might not notice. But if I've just eaten or have a full bladder, I walk with that tell-tale stretch, that arch in my back trying to give my body more room. Many of you know how that is. I took my last airplane flight last week and now I'm hunkered down for at least six months. Begin Full Gestation Mode.

Ipod shuffle quiz

'Cause why not...a little lyrics quiz. See if you can name these tunes without googling! I'm randomly typing up lines from a few songs on my ipod mix. The first to get all right will be rewarded well in the next life, because I'm too lame to offer a temporal prize. I still haven't gotten to the post office to mail the boxes of books from January's contest winners. (They're here, boxed, ready, set....) I'll try to be fair with this and not do anything too obscure, though this probably favors the older set. (Who is Justin Beiber?) I know if Marcus Aurelius checks this he'll get them all because he's creepy good at this stuff. So the challenge: Get as many as you can before Marcus shows ups and cleans house.

1. It's poetry in motion, she turns her tender eyes to me

2. I can feel an angel walking next to me

3. Well it's a darn good life and it's kinda funny

4. My mama loves me, she loves me, she gets down on her knees and hug me

5. She's got apple bottom jeans and boots with the fur

6. It could hold eight kids, four hound dogs, and the piggie we stole from the shed

7. The stranger in my face says he knows my mom and went to my high school

8. All the boys think she's a spy

9. Everybody's gone in the cotton and the corn

10. My friends keep tellin' me that you ain't no good, oh but they don't know that I would leave you if I could

"I knew he loved me when he hocked a logie at my face."

That happened to me. Fifth grade. Gavin. It landed near my nose and I could smell it. I felt humiliated and denigrated, but I didn't report it to the teacher or anyone.

Last week I was with a friend when her 5-year-old daughter reported that a boy her age had been pushing her consistently. Her mother comforted her by telling her that this meant the boy liked her, that when boys like girls they didn't know how to express it so they showed their affection by bullying them. Now, I was told the same thing by my mother, and I've heard that same explanation many times. I don't think I thought twice about it till I saw "He's Just Not That Into You," which starts with a similar scene. The little girl absorbs that information, then we jump forward to adult women who, still confused by all this, allow themselves to be treated horribly by men, believing that that's how men show their affection. How far do we let this go?

In Scotland recently, 11 and 12-year-olds were questioned about when violence is okay, as in when it's okay for a man to hit a woman.

"The children didn't agree with violence, but gave reasons to try to justify it if the woman had done something 'wrong'.  They were asked to consider whether or not a man was justified in punching his partner when he found out she had had an affair. Nearly all of the children thought that the woman deserved to be hit. In another scenario, about 80% of the children said a man had cause to slap his partner because she did not have the dinner ready on time. 'The old saying of 'If he pulls your pigtails it means he likes you', translates into violence in adulthood which girls accept as normal.'"

What is wrong with us? Seriously! This is insanity! Heaven help my son if I ever catch him hurting a girl. Of course I can tell him till I'm blue in the face that being stronger than someone else means you have to be more careful with them and respectful and helpful and NEVER gives you license to hurt them. But kids don't learn by being told. They learn by example. How thankful I am that my kids live in a home where their father treats their mother with respect and love, and we can model an equal partnership.

I'm determined not to use the "it means he likes you" excuse on my daughters. This is justifying a boy's bad behavior and requiring a girl to accept it and even be grateful for it. A boy should not have pulled your pigtail, honey, or pushed you down or thrown a rock at your head. End of story. What's-his-face shot Ronald Reagan to show his love for Jodie Foster, but we didn't say, ahh, he has a crush and doesn't know how to express it! Isn't that sweet? No way. Violence is violence. And children bullying children in any way and for any reason is not okay and no girl should have to put up with it.

So, what's up with you?

I really appreciate the comments you've given over the last few posts. While many people feel passionately, I'm grateful we can express opinions respectfully.

So...I'm getting huge. I had no idea before getting into this  how different a multiples pregnancy is than a singleton. I'm feeling SO much better from the nausea! Which is a relief beyond words. But I'm still preggo, and my body naturally puts all priority on nurturing fetuses (feti? fetui?) leaving not much energy left for the mama. Yesterday I managed to make dinner (with Dean's help) then when we sat down to eat I was hit was such extreme exhaustion I started to fall asleep upright. I had to lie down while everyone else ate. And it was yummy tacos with perfectly ripe cantaloupe. My kids ate my cantaloupe. Demons. It's bizarre how completely taken over I feel. I'm 21 weeks and the gals are a'wigglin'. 

With the ticking time bomb in my belly, I have about three more weeks left in which I can run errands and clean out closets before my doc suggests I fine tune my impersonation of a couch potato. And three more months to finish a book before my life becomes one long sleepless dream. I spent a couple weeks going over Daisy Danger Brown and there's no chance I can get a final draft by September. It needs work, baby, and how.

But meanwhile, Midnight in Austenland is looking great! What a treat! After getting my first editorial letter from my editor last week, I really think I can finish a final draft before the beasties arrive. I'll still need to find time after that to go over the many copy edited and proofing passes, but hopefully there will be windows of sanity. Right? Right, fellow mothers of multiples? There will be some windows of sanity surely? I'll finish this draft (the third), let Dean read, rewrite 1-2 times, let a couple of writer friends read, rewrite 1-2 times, let my editor read, rewrite 2-3 times, and cross my fingers that only takes three months. It's tight, but we're going for it. My editor had a new baby this year and also has a pair of twin girls, so she's so wonderfully empathetic. 

So off I go. Goal for today's writing: make myself laugh.

Warning: this post contains scenes of graphic violence and dangerous opinions

The Books of Bayern are finalists for this year's Mythopoeic Award! the goose girl was a finalist its year, but I didn't realize that the Mythopoeic Awards often honor entire series of books. I'm honored for the whole series. It's a lovely award with a group of extremely fine finalists.

Some of you have wondered about the STD stats Janette Rallison referenced on my blog two posts ago. She elaborates on her own blog for those interested.

The comments on the previous posts have wandered over the topic of a book rating system. This is something that people have proposed many times, and was of great debate in the UK the past couple of years. I can see the appeal. We talk about parents reading the books their kids read. What if a parent has three voracious readers of all ages? How can he or she possibly keep up? If a book outlined the maturity level (different from age level) and listed some of the questionable topics, then wouldn't that be great for parents?

My problem is I just don't see how it can possibly work to any effect at all. I'd love to be convinced of this, but I don't see how it can function. It is so hard to take an incident out of a story's context. For example, book of a thousand days is often thought of as my most moral book. The main character has very strong personal values and is so courageous and loyal, I'm bitter I don't get to be her. I'm very proud of how that story turned out and would be thrilled to share it with any reader age 10-100. Now those of you who have read it, imagine if it were subjected to a rating system and came with a label that cautioned: Total Public Nudity, Violence, Parental Abuse, Sensuality, Warfare, Starvation, Religious Viewpoint. Goodness, what a smutty and morally objectionable title! It's sure to offend everyone! Burn it, I say! Burn away! How can any rating or warning sum up what a story tells or what a reader's response to it might be? What good would those labels really do? Think of all the books you've read that contained Sexual Content and how vastly different they are. There are some books with Sexual Content I would hope every twelve-year-old would read, and others I would never read myself.

Think about the books you studied in high school English class and the warning labels that would accompany those. But those were (most likely) adult books, so they wouldn't have labels. They're given to kids, but wouldn't be labeled like children's books would. Instead, the entire YA section, which in my mind are far more age-appropriate than Hemingway, Steinbeck, Chaucer, etc., would be branded. Imagine all those parents eyeballing the labels, forbidding their kids from reading books that might have had huge positive impact on their lives.

Realistically, the kids who self-monitor their reading would put down a book themselves once they hit a passage they were uncomfortable with. And the other kids, the ones parents are probably most worried about, wouldn't they be more attracted to a book that advertised "Sexual Content, Graphic Violence!" I'm making these words larger because they are what would stand out. They would stand out to school districts and school libraries who might be pressured to ban any books with certain kinds of content, no matter the context and value.

I want to add, too, that I think this is a system that could be misunderstood and abused by either side of the continuum. Sometimes we shout the loudest about those darn conservatives who are too jumpy about sex and violence and diverse lifestyles. But the truth is that half the voices of protest come from those darn liberals who are too jumpy about religion and conservative values. This is not a conservative nor a liberal issue. It's just a matter of will a book rating system really accomplish what we hope it would? Or will it backfire and in turn limit freedom of speech for people of all beliefs?

Comment away!